Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Because this is how it is...

Let me tell you a little secret that some of you already know - it's not easy being a military spouse. It's not easy being a spouse, period, but when you throw in deployments, long work hours, etc., life can be particularly difficult.

That being said, this life will either make you or break you. I hadn't planned on marrying a guy in the Army. I had my life set. Then that funny little thing called love hit me and one of us (not me) was getting married as a teenager.

There were many, many times I thought I couldn't do this. I literally did break, but with the help of friends and family, much like Humpty Dumpty, I was put back together again.

Through the 15 years of being a Ranger wife, I've done a lot of things I thought I would never do. I always thought I'd have a husband, father, uncle, cousin, etc., around to help me when I needed something. All of my male relatives live in Massachusetts - I live in Georgia. I've had lawnmowers die on me during deployments, but did I go and complain about it? Hell no. I hefted my ass into the truck, drove up to Lowe's, and bought a new lawnmower. I added the oil and did everything I had to to make that thing run.

One Christmas Eve (of course, during another deployment) my washing machine started leaking water. Murphy and his Laws can suck it. I didn't sit and cry, or call someone and bitch about how unfair life is - I once again got in the truck and went to Lowe's. With the help of my fellow Ranger wife, we brought the new washing machine in the house and I got it all hooked up and running.

I'm not bragging, I'm just stating the facts here. Shit is going to happen whether your husband is at work, in the field, deployed, at a school, etc. While it's nice to depend on others, and certainly, my fellow Army spouses have definitely always been there, you have to learn to depend on yourself. Did I want to have to euthanize our first dog, Adam's dog girlfriend, without him? No, of course not. Unfortunately, he was in Iraq. All I could do was send him an email to please call me when he could.

This is your life as a military spouse. Don't let it break you. I wouldn't be the tough-as-nails chick I am today if I had not had all of these experiences. I can also bench press 500 lbs., but that's a different subject for another day.


Tasha said...

Thanks for the post! It kills me when the young ones cant handle their own. I dont remember being so helpless but thats just me. Here's to us old ladies!!!!!!!!!

Nikki St. Amant said...

I call bullshit! You ain't bench pressing 500 pounds!!! Quit lyin'!!! I can't even bench press 500 pounds and I was born ith Neanderthal muscles. I hope you know I'm just messing with you...