Before every deployment, I come up with tons of stuff to keep me busy - paint the bathroom, make everyone scarves for Christmas, clean out the attic, etc. I guess I do this as a way to ease my mind, that I will keep myself busy and also accomplish something along the way.
Have I done any of this? Yeah, I painted the bathroom and the vanity and replaced the silver stuff with bronze. It took me weeks, but I was very busy with the logistics of tragedy and being an FRG leader.
Now that the end is sort of in sight, I'm rushing around like a damn fool. I need to clean! I need to buy every single thing for Thanksgiving dinner! I need to get the guest room ready by next Wednesday!
In reality, it's not much. It just feels like it, because I didn't do much during the deployment, always pushing it off, thinking I had plenty of time.
Here's where I could really kick my own ass - I was told that our company HAD to spend our money that was so generously donated. I had to come up with something within a few hours. I'm not a good thinker under pressure, and usually my brain farts one of those juicy, better-check-your-panties farts. You know which ones I mean.
I decided, oh, it would be nice to make an ornament for each and every wife in the company. After some trial and tribulation, I think I've figured it out (and lots of anger and frustration). It will be time and labor-intensive, but I think anything handmade is always nice. Then I tallied up how many wives....55. Fifty-fucking-five. I'm a glutton for punishment.