Friday, February 22, 2008

The Heir with no spare


Maybe it's the gloomy, rainy weather making me reflective. Who knows? Anyway, this morning I started thinking about the stuff that pisses me off. And what has pissed me off for 8 and a half years is being told by everyone from family to perfect strangers is that I need to have another child. Excuse me? Isn't this my body and my life?

In a nutshell: I have one son, who is 8 and a half. He is the light of our lives. He is handsome, smart, funny, and an all-around awesome kid. His teacher said he was the most mature kid in his class.

Addison was born in June 1999. Around the time where I might have started thinking about having more kids, our country was attacked. I knew Sept. 11 would change my life forever, and it did. It might sound like a big excuse, but it's my life and my blog, so there.

Within hours of the Twin Towers falling, I knew that my husband would be going to war. He's in the special operations of the Army-first to deploy. And he did-Oct. 12, 2001. It was a very scary time for me, especially one week later, Oct. 19, when I saw his unit parachuting into an airfield in Afghanistan. I didn't know it at the time, but he was part of that. I didn't know where he was, what he was doing or when he would be home. We had no communication with him for over a month.

Luckily, he came home in early December. But that wasn't the end of it. He has deployed five more times in support of OEF and OIF since then. None of the deployments have been easy, but he has returned to us after each deployment, which is a blessing.

That said, there was never a good time to have another child. I made the conscious decision that I did not want to have more kids. I did not want to give birth without him there. I did not want to be pregnant without him there. I give major props to the woman who do-they are heroes also.

I haven't had that yearning to have more kids. I am perfectly happy with the child I have. At this point, I'm 33 years old and have no desire to have another child. We're able to pick up and go whenever we feel like it. Bored? Let's go to Wally World-get in the truck and let's go. A beautiful sunny morning in the summer? Jump on the boat, let's go fishing. At this point, another kid would cramp our style. Yeah, that sounds harsh, but we've gotten used to our life like this. I enjoy it immensely.

So, no, it's not too bad that I only have one child. No, I don't need to have more just because someone else thinks I should. If someone thought I should shave off all my hair just because I should, would I do that? No, no and hell no. I can think for myself, plan my life as much as God lets me and make my own decisions.

Until you live my life, walk a mile in my shoes, and think my thoughts, keep your opinions to yourself.

Did I mention I'm very stubborn?

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